What is Drastic + Dramatic

Friday, October 10, 2008

Ode to Spectacles

Due to the impending surgery of tomorrow, my glasses will be of no use in less than 24 hours. These glasses and I have been together for a long time. Sure, I've messed around a little with contacts, but still glasses and I have had a forgiving and lasting relationship. In honor of these memories, I make up a poem for glasses. And it's my 100th post. Neat.

Before you, my life was incomplete.
Looking ahead was a painful feat.
When you came into my life
It was as if a big knife
Cut through the air
And removed the glare
Of what seemed like two hands made of wax paper held always before my eyes.

You did something to me.
I mean, besides help me see.
It's like you made everything clear
Like I could finally hear
As if I'd been deaf before.
Or as though you opened a door
Where there had only been a wall as far as eye could see.

I remember when I left you on the bed.
Thinking for sure you were elsewhere instead
I rolled over and heard you cry.
When I held you up, all was awry.
Gently, tightly, I bent your frame
back to normal; but you were never the same.
But later we were able to look back and laugh at the experience that night.

There was nothing between us;
I was me, you were you: we've been us
since every day we've been together.
Over hills, under roofs and into weather
we always got along. In fact,
Even your disappearing act
Would make me laugh for the irony of seeking that which I can't see so I can see.

As I say goodbye it's like...like
hard, I guess. Sometimes I think, 'yike
s' because now what will I do
When I'm nervous and need to
Nudge you into place
On the nose on my face
As I think of what to say to whomever awaits my reply.

Friend, window to the world;
Now an oyster unpearled.
I will not forget you fast.
After all, we have a past.
But my days as caterpillar are through
As flying above I will have a view
More like that of a butterfly's, in the sky, twice as high as a caterpillar's.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

Dangling Modifiers

In my English editing class we had an assignment to create ten sentences each featuring a dangling modifier. What is that? Well, I can't really tell you in words of definition. I like to show. Here were some great ones. You'll see what it is.

I saw my brother being born sitting in the chair.
Marinated in the finest seasonings, people enjoy themselves.
Having been dropped from a ten story building, Sean examined the egg for any damages.
Fred explained why he wanted to get married to his aunt.
After being decapitated, Fred began to prepare the chicken for dinner.
Jack waited for his parents to go inside to light the fireworks.
Squished by 80 MPH speeds, Tod flicked the bug's body off of the windshield.
Upon walking into the room, the ancient mummy caught the archeologist's eye.

and from my own list:
He punched me with his fist in my eye.
I walked the dog in a bear costume.
Luke fixed the clock with no hands.

Do you see the beauty of this language? :)
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