Up to Date

Howdy. Here are a few things that have been through my brain lately.

School buses aren't yellow. Lemons are, post-it notes are, boogers when you're sick are....but school buses aren't. Lines on the road, the double solid lines, ya know, aren't yellow. They're school bus colored. And school buses are the color of macaroni and cheese. Or easy squeeze cheese. Velveeta. Not yellow.

But still, those cheesy colors are quite noticeable. You'd think. People are so dumb. I'm really just amazed at who's allowed to drive. Parents are the mostly dumb. There was a parent stopped, waiting for his one pimply kid, in my spot. A spot that says "bus loading only." So, I boxed him in. I'm sick of it. Tell your nasty kid to meet you somewhere else. I've got 60 kids to load, you have one. Who's more important? Me, that's right. He inched his way out of my trap, but not before he called me a pretty name. The name of a place he can kiss for all I care. Which is none. None caring.

Make room for me. I accelerate slowly, yes. But I DO come to a stop slowly. I understand you don't want to be caught behind my exhaust dumping, butt-slow mode of transportation, but cutting me off is unwise. I'm patient, but I have power. I get your license plate and I could accuse you of much. Just be careful. But again, I'm patient. And again, no caring.

My mom bought cheap toilet paper. You know how tissues for your boogers come in layers? Even cheap tissues come in layers. If you peeled that tissue to it's last thread of whatever it is, that's our toilet paper. Worse than that of churches, or restaurants, or back-of-a-tour bus bathrooms. But it is better than nothing....kind of.

Twistie ties are valuable. It used to be that I'd throw them away like stale pretzels. Now since I use them, a lot of them, and never can find enough, I save them wherever I see them. Even where I won't ever use it, I save it. They are dear to me now. It's strange.

It's funny how my body refuses to get hungry since my throat is sore. Swallowing hurts. So my stomach must be friends with my throat (they have a special connection) because I'm not hungry so I don't have to swallow. I'm sick, I can't swallow, I'm not hungry. I'll probably lose some weight again.

I've been seeing the time 10:01 a lot lately. Never on purpose. It's cool, as it's a numerical palindrome, but my favorite is still mysteriously 9:23.

And that's it for now, more or less. Good times as a bus driver! I get to drive a field trip today! huzzah.